Hey Guys,
So weirdly this week was eventful, and not in the best way...
I am pathetic.
Let me tell you why.
You see I've been talking to this boy for a while now (don't worry he isn't a pervert we have met I haven't been cat fished it's all good guys) and I guess I had grown to like him, to a point where I had a crush.
It was just the jokes he made and I thought we really clicked and everything really.
So one day he asks for advice, girl advice, so knowing me I agreed and BAM he asked about this girl he liked from his school who is a year below him (my year, but not my school) and how he wasn't sure if he liked her and what he should do.
My heart sunk.
It was stupid, I knew he didn't feel the same way and I still didn't entirely know if I proper liked him or not, but when those words lit up on my screen. I knew then exactly how I felt for him.
Now I am one to hide my emotions extremely well, for instance I hate crying. I don't do it often but when I do it makes me angry so I end up in a mood and a headache, which just makes everything worse quite frankly.
But somehow after learning this information from the boy I liked it really hurt and I did cry, and it was pathetic. I knew he'd never like me back and somehow I hoped he would, but then he said something.
"I doubt anyone feels like I do rn"
And somehow I had the courage to say "I do" and when he asked how I gave him this message about a boy who I liked but wasn't sure on it, hinting everyway that it was him who was the boy.
He still doesn't realise I meant him in that message and it frustrates me.
See how pathetic I am?
hinting that I like him instead of telling, crying over someone who was never mine to have and getting frustrating at something silly.
I am pathetic but you know what? I accept it, because I learnt from the experience.
I guess that's something good about blogging and life.
I can tell you guys (or no one) everything that has happened to me without anyone I know finding out. It also helps because it makes me re think the situation and learn from it too which actually helps me a lot as well.
But please I know you all don't comment much but I need your opinion, was it okay for me to cry to do what I did?
I mean the boy and I are friends still but I really want to know.
want more posts like this? add me if you ant and comment below because I want to know what is interesting and what isn't, I know I need to be confident and post what I want but still, doesn't hurt to ask right?
No more hiding, no more anonymous, just me
Izzy xx
